Tuesday, November 29

Dear Mom,

I don't know how this started
or when it all began
I don't know when you gave up on me
or when you started to not give a damn.

Your love for me shattered to pieces
and I watched as it fell to the floor.
You left me when I needed you most
and never looking back, you walked out the door.

I never measured up to your expectations
I was never good enough for you
and as much as you may deny it
its dreadfully true.

You could never tell me you hate me
but I can see it in your eyes
And every time you'd say you loved me or that you cared,
I could see right through your lies.

You don't know how much I wanted to be good enough
or even how much I tried.
You never really noticed me
or how much I actually cried.

But I'm done caring,
caring about how you see me
And I don't give a fuck what you want
I'll be whatever I want to be

So think think what you want
and call me every name in the book
Just sit back and watch me throw it all away
go ahead and shoot me another dirty look

I know I'm not perfect
and I've accepted that I'm never going to be
but at least when I look in the mirror
I can stomach the person looking back at me.