My stomach is sinking
I can't shake this feeling
When will I finally stop hurting?
When will I begin healing?

I'm so lost right now
I feel so empty inside
I don't know how to show my emotions
they're so much easier just to hide

I feel like screaming
but no sound ever comes out
I want to open up and cry
instead of just sit here and pout

I wish I had the answers
I wish I knew what to do
You would have made this much easier
you would have known how to get me through

I don't know how to show my emotions
for something that happens that is this bad
I don't know how else to react
I don't know how to deal with feeling this sad.

Dear Mom,

I don't know how this started
or when it all began
I don't know when you gave up on me
or when you started to not give a damn.

Your love for me shattered to pieces
and I watched as it fell to the floor.
You left me when I needed you most
and never looking back, you walked out the door.

I never measured up to your expectations
I was never good enough for you
and as much as you may deny it
its dreadfully true.

You could never tell me you hate me
but I can see it in your eyes
And every time you'd say you loved me or that you cared,
I could see right through your lies.

You don't know how much I wanted to be good enough
or even how much I tried.
You never really noticed me
or how much I actually cried.

But I'm done caring,
caring about how you see me
And I don't give a fuck what you want
I'll be whatever I want to be

So think think what you want
and call me every name in the book
Just sit back and watch me throw it all away
go ahead and shoot me another dirty look

I know I'm not perfect
and I've accepted that I'm never going to be
but at least when I look in the mirror
I can stomach the person looking back at me.

Why?

Was I not good enough for you?
Did I say something to make you go?
Why were there no signs of it?
You never let it show.

You make me wonder,
I wonder everyday
is there something I could have done?
or something I should say?

Was I not pretty enough?
or is it that I'm not too smart?
I thought my love would be enough for you,
I gave you my whole heart

I thought you would never hurt me
I thought you'd never put me through pain
I thought I'd never lose you
and if I did I'd go insane

You were my first love
but you didn't feel the same way back
I thought things were going great
but we couldn't keep them in tact

It hurts that I lost my love
but I lost way more than you can imagine
I lost something that hurts way more
I lost my best friend

I want to know how you see me,                                          
do you see through all the rumors and the lies?
How do you love me,
when I'm someone that others despise?

How can you be proud of me,
when others have slandered my name?
Is this some kind of joke to you,
are you playing a game?

How could you love me
and see past what other do?
How could I possibly know,
know that your love is true?

You've always been there
you've always seen past the lies
you know I've done nothing,
nothing you could ever despise

You never listened to others
and what they said about me
You knew it couldn't be true,
you know that's just not me

There's no game
there's just you and me
No lies, rumors, or deceit
just the truth that you can see

You've been there for me
just like I'll always be there for you
Just as long as you know
our love is true

you have my heart

sometimes you drive me crazy

and i have no words to describe how i feel

maybe thats how its supposed to be

and maybe thats what makes this real

i know we don't always get along

but we do a good job to try

just know i'll always forgive

and be there for you when you cry

i'll be there for you

through thick and thin

through all the bad and all the good

i'll forgive your every sin

i know you're a good person

and you have a good heart

even if others don't see it

i've seen it from the start

nothing could change my mind

about the way i feel about you

you love me for me

and cheer me up when i'm blue

you're my only concern

and my main priority

when i see a smile on your face

thats what makes me happy

i love you

and i hope its something you know

you mean the world to me

and i never want to forget to let it show

love/hate

i hate what you do

everything you stand for

the things you say

and i always find myself wanting more

you drive me crazy

but yet i can't be with out you

you make me want to scream

but without you i'd have no clue

you make me angry

and you make me smile

i cant stand you

but i want to be with you for a while

i cant explain it

you make me sick

your like a bad habit

that i cant just quit

you destroy me

but you make me strong

i love you

even if it is wrong

i love you

you look me in the eyes
you take my breathe away
you make me speechless
and i don't know what else to say

you give my butterflies all the time
and make me feel like i'm flying
and when i'm sad you make me smile
without even trying

you make me feel like a little kid again
like nothing in the world could ever go wrong
you keep a smile on my face
and you keep it there all day long

you smile makes me melt inside
and it makes me smile too
i love holding your hand
and i love being with you

i'd be so lost without you
without you i'd have no clue
and thats what i never hesitate to say
i love you<3